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Finding Your Resilience in Grief

“More than education, more than experience, more than training, a person’s level of resilience will determine who succeeds and who fails.”

Diane Coutu

3 Steps to Help Your Grief Process

1. Accept the reality for what it is.

Sometimes difficult to do, this is one outcome that happens after the shock passes. The timeline for developing this perspective is different for everyone. Coming to terms with the fact your loved one has passed can be difficult, and, this focus can help ground you through the grieving process.

2. Make your mental, spiritual, and psychological health a priority.

It can feel counter-intuitive to focus on yourself when a loved one has died, but your state of mind, your mind and your spirit will all determine future outcomes of your life. Don’t go to war with yourself and stop eating, sleeping, and managing things in your life. You are the one living. You know yourself better than anyone, you know what you need. This is the time to turn your focus back onto you.

3. Find your resilient self.

Research shows that resilience impacts the state of someone’s mental health. People with strong resiliency are found to have a sense of humor and are able to ask for help.


Coutu, Diane. (2015). How Resilience Works. HBR’s 10 Must Reads: On Emotional Intelligence. Harvard Business Review Press, Boston Massachusetts.

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